The Life Of A Mental Health Family Carer Can Be One Of Constant Turmoil

Last Updated on Tuesday, 6 September 2011 04:20 Written by Natural Health Team Tuesday, 6 September 2011 04:20

Health Information about The Life Of A Mental Health Family Carer Can Be One Of Constant Turmoil

“How Am I Ever Going To Be Able To Cope?”

These were my thoughts when my son was admitted to a mental health ward for the first time 12 years ago.  Let me give you a quick insight as to how I had come to these thoughts before I explain more about the first visit.

He had been displaying some very odd signs but we thought that maybe he had been taking some drugs and that was the result.   

He had not slept for several days apparently (he was not living at home at the time) and I did not realise the severity of these signs until a couple of times within two days he went out in his car, left the car and did not know where it was.  When we found it each time it was in the strangest of places.

Following this we took him to the general hospital where he saw some mental health doctors was diagnosed as having a mental illness. He was admitted and was kept in hospital for a week.

As you can imagine I have never cried so much in all my life as through that week. As a parent of a much loved son this was all too much to comprehend. It was frightening to say the least. It is a time of utter desolation especially if you do not know anything about mental illness and its consequences.

Fortunately, from listening to many carers over the years it does seem that life becomes more bearable with time and as the carer learns from each experience and instigates strategies that help with coping.

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Carers of family members (and I include juvenile carers looking after parents) will never have the life again that they had before the illness took hold.

Juvenile carers develop emotionally well before their time and their emotions for the rest of their life I just cannot conceive, nor understand what they go through.

Parents of a child being committed to a mental facility experiences so many emotions that I wonder if they can ever get a grip on what those first times were like.

*denial*shock*numbness*desire to understand*horror at what they are told*guilt*hopelessness*isolation*desperation*protectiveness*blame*remorse*fear*anger*aggression*depression*relief at finding out there is something wrong*anxiety to get it fixed*loneliness at who to talk to*this can’t be true*

So with a list like this you can understand that the health of the carer and other family members is going to be affected as the stress levels sky rocket.  These emotions will cause reactions like: lack of sleep, change of eating habits, the shakes, feeling nauseous, exhaustion, headaches, short temper, overindulging in alcohol, smoking heavily, and other problems that are related to stress which could be diarrhoea or constipation.

The affect on the whole family at a time like this is enormous.  Some families pull together and other families fall apart as the stress causes blame and guilt that rips a family apart. Even the extended family will add their bit which will also affect the emotions and the result from that can also be hopelessly negative.

Family and friends who have not experienced mental illness in their own immediate family have no idea what a parent in this circumstance is going through.  Other family members may be scared that it is genetic and could run in their family and friends can see the change in you and wonder what it is all about.

Turn to these people who you might want to talk to only once or for weeks, but don’t let isolation set in.  Even if you cannot get out and meet these people for whatever reason there is the phone so use it and find someone to listen, but only talk to those that take a more positive position.

Asperger Syndrome

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